Wednesday: a tribute to my long-lost Puma Mostro

Oh poor old Puma Mostro: how I have ignored you for so long!  Once upon a time I took Trinny and Suzannah's advice and bought a grey/silver pair from eBay, however their size 9 was too small and I had to sell them again, then I purchased a white and red pair which reminded me of a cherry bakewell's colouring, well one you wear on your feet anyway.  I then added to my collection by purchasing a grey material pair from eBay, but wore them a few times and consigned them to the pit of hell which doubles as my understairs cupboard.

However, today was your renaissance day, oh neglected Puma Mostro and here they are.  A size 9.5 and proud - long live the Mostro.  Actually I have just bought a new pair for the Duke as his foot is still bad and now he's developed DVT.  Oh dear!

Monday: shoe care

Brr - it's nearly March and it's still flipping freezing!

Anyway, I don't think we've ever discussed shoe care have we?  Well, we are now.  Yesterday I cleaned four pairs of shoes, caressing the soft leather as I did so.  I do find it a complete pain though, as I do so many jobs around the house so wondered whether advertising for a slave via Craigslist would be a good idea?  Maybe.  Perhaps a pro-rata one anyway.

Mind you, dressing the part would be a bit tiresome after a while - all that PVC's bound to chafe quite a bit and there's a limit to how much talcum powder one can lavish over one's body.  Perhaps chip fat would suffice?

Monday: Birkies are back on the QVC spring preview!

Yay!  Another year and most importantly the mighty QVC seems to be previewing their spring collection for our enjoyment.  On Saturday night I recorded (yes, don't judge!) the first of their Birkenstock shows and my word, what a selection they had!  They were mostly patterned but I'm getting more into that and am sitting here typing in my Dorian ladybird clogs.  As I've said many times before I think it's the banality I adore and of course, the viewers who call in to talk about their love of the teutonic comfort sandal: one woman said that she'd had a pair of Birkies for thirteen years and had only recently thrown them out.  Seriously: ugh.  Saying that, I tend to walk everywhere and wear mine out. 

I think that it's a sad reflection on my good self that I know so much about Birkenstock - right down to their construction.  My husband, The Duke is also becoming a bit of a fan now, especially ever since he's developed plantar fascilataris (sp?) - well his tendon's gone all odd anyway.  Not a day goes by these days without a selection of different insoles arriving in the post - rock and roll!

Here's a lovely treat for you all: a picture of my now long gone red gizehs from last year.  Yum!

Friday: Jo Brand on tonight's Room 101

Tonight I watched the wonderful Frank Skinner's Room 101 and laughed when she tried to put high heeled shoes into the dreaded pit of hell for all of the reasons I usually state.  I thought the footage of a high heeled shoe race in Moscow was hilarious though. 

Monday: more snow but toosies are snug in bedsocks

Yes, it's snowing again in the UK but at least we're not as affected as the US at the moment.  It's very slushy out there and I wore my spotty wellies again: so nice to drag those out of the garage for an airing once more!  After the school run on foot (as usual) I am now back indoors snug inside my M&S bed socks (well, my feet are - I'd never fit the rest of me inside them) they really shouldn't be consigned to just the bedroom in my humble opinion - they're seemingly suitable for everyday wear.  Actually, it reminds me of those slipper socks you can buy, although I've never really invested in a pair because they don't make the women's ones big enough for me!

I was reading the Sunday Times Culture Magazine yesterday and noticed a review of a fiction book.  Apparently the main protagonist didn't initially like a woman because 'her feet were too big' - do you think that's a normal thing to notice when you first encounter a lady?  It's going back to my Cinderella persecution thing once more isn't it?  I bet Ana, the love interest in Fifty Shades of Grey takes a dainty size four doesn't she?  Most heroines in romantic/erotic fiction are tiny and have tiny bone structures, akin to a bird's.  Lovely.  So do I, if indeed that bird was the mighty albatross!

Friday: toning up and the benefits of exercise

Aren't sports socks comfy?  I thought that as I donned a pair to go with my jogging bottoms and other sports gear before playing ExerBeat after work yesterday.  For the initiated ExerBeat is a game on the Nintendo Wii console which acts as an exercise program and is made more fun by utilizing the Wii remotes to score points for perfect moves and spot on rhythm.  I've now owned it since early January and I honestly feel that I'm toning up everywhere, although the scales tell me otherwise. 

The game contains a series of different routines which are hosted by various trainers - i.e. a perky ponytailed blonde leads the aerobics section; a trendy black guy motivates the user through hip hop and the karate master is an eastern avatar with a whole host of strange, but worthy sayings such as "if you continue in this manner I can foresee great inner strength in the near future."  The boxercise bloke is blond and hunky and the pilates and yoga teachers are as calm and serene as you'd expect.  At least it's fun, my issues with exercise stem from the fact that I don't really enjoy it and therefore will go out of my way to avoid it.

Monday: historical shoes compared to fetish stilettos

Last week myself and the Duke went to the London Museum of Textile and Fashion: http://www.ftmlondon.org/ it is situated in an area of London (SE1) which is being dug up as part of the project to enlarge London Bridge Station and to incorporate Crossrail, so as you can imagine, it was difficult to locate the museum, but I'm glad to say that we did.  There was an exhibition of the work of Hardy Amies and Norman Hartnell who provided the present Queen with her selection of splendid outfits.  Quite frankly, even for the day I found many of his designs a little frumpy and was interested to note that Diana, Princess of Wales didn't end up wearing a rather boxy blue suit which would have probably suited Margaret Thatcher a little better.

Anyway: shoes - I took the liberty of photographing the display of evening shoes for your delight, which are pictured below:

I cannot say that I'm particularly enamoured with either pair - are you?  Ditto below really....zzzzzz

Later on in the day we ventured into the Bond Street/Oxford Street branch of Next and had a browse in their basement shoe department.  I was particularly taken with a sparkly pair of high heeled peep toe courts but of course, they aren't particularly suited to my lifestyle.  However, I did note these faux patent leather platform stilettos which, in my opinion, bordered onto the fetish scene because I cannot imagine how anyone can walk in a five inch heel?

I know that the majority of men find them sexy, but I would wobble about like an enormous jelly in them!  Just imagine them juxtaposed with my new Birkie clogs - now that would be worth seeing....  Talking of stilettos, apparently Marilyn Monroe achieved her famous wiggle walk by lopping half an inch off of one heel - I can't think where I read this, but I guess it's true. 

Sunday: new Birkis Dorian clogs

Good morning and yes, I am currently wearing a pair of Birkenstocks?  Why on earth is that you may cry, well I'm sitting here typing in my enormous Janet Reger (hold on: not as sexy as it sounds) velvet hooded robe and my faithful red patent Birkenstock Madrids.  Even though I've owned them for quite a few years now they're still rather splendid - my favourite is the feel of the soft suede footbed sensuously caressing the sole of one's foot: yum!

OK, so I purchased a new pair of Birkenstocks, well they're Birki Dorian clogs to be exact and despite years of umming and ahhing I've never parted with any hard earned cash for a pair of Birkies which wasn't in the traditional sandal format, but knowing how much I adore the sheer comfort of these Teutonic trotters, I thought I'd go a bit wild.

I am fully aware that they're grey and emblazoned with huge ladybirds and know that it's an 'interesting' choice of footwear.  They slightly remind me of Gaston, the ladybird/dog character in the popular children's TV show Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom, but there you go.  They're very comfortable though and although they're on a narrow footbed (I tend to chose the normal ones!) they fit like a glove.  Obviously above I'm pairing them with a pair of socks, but this is what they look like without:

Finally, if you place both feet together the pattern joins!  Isn't that clever?  Who says that you don't learn anything from watching the Birkenstock shows on QVC?  Hmmm. 

Saturday: black painted toenails and shiny red shoes

As promised, I thought it time to photograph and display my black toenails to the world as I am aware that you foot fans enjoy visual images, so there you go:

I think they're fairly nice, although at a quick glance you'd be forgiven for confusing them with fellow darker hued polishes like deep purple (not the heavy metal band mind!) but I like them.  If you look closely at my left foot you can see why I may be experiencing problems with exercise as it looks more splayed than the right one.  I tend to strap it up a fair amount but am hoping that wearing Birkenstocks in the summer may sort it out a bit.

I wore my new Clarks deep red shiny shoes to work on Thursday and they were fab.  They look really good paired with black opaque tights as you can see in the picture shown above.  My tights have got a bobbly patch on the right ankle though and look a bit shoddy as a result.