Thursday: Black and White Betulas

Regular readers will be more than aware of my love for the Birkenstock brand.  So with this in mind I've purchased two additional pairs of flip flops, one in black and the other in white, both are pictured below:

The white pair look fab don't they?  Well, they will until they get grubby anyway...

I also have a deep love for the black numbers, especially as they have silver detailing on them.

If you're wondering about the nail polish, well it's a Boots Number 7 shade called Totally Teal.  I'll be doing a pedicure next week with my new lilac shade.  Respect!

Monday: Birkenstock Kay Clogs With A Soft Footbed

Yes, I've talked about Birkenstocks until I'm blue in the face but I did end up buying *another* pair the other week directly from their website.  The clogs in question are a style called Kay which boast a soft footbed (i.e. an extra layer of latex under the suede insole) and I agree with the lady from QVC, it is very much like stepping onto a memory foam mattress.  I have often felt like strapping two mattresses to my feet and leaping around like Zebedee, but have fought off the urge so far.

As you can see they are a bit of a tobacco colour, also, despite being the regular width, they're fairly wide and I'm rattling around in them somewhat.

There you go - a side shot.  Actually the sole unit reminds me of Oreo biscuits.  Yum.  You will undoubtedly see the back strap which can either be positioned behind the heel or shortened and pushed back over the upper(!)  I'll let you know how comfortable they prove to be.  They do make my feet look huge though but I'm used to it, so there!

Monday: You To Me Are A Series of Statistics

Yeah, I admit it, I do read the blogger stats which provide me with a list of readers broken down by country, browser and search keyword.  Why you might say?  Well, my answer's this, sometimes I feel as though I'm typing stuff and nobody's really out there.  It's an odd feeling anyway. 

Sunday: Zebra Print Tabora Papillo Birkenstocks

I think I've mentioned in the past during one of my innumerate other tedious blurbs that the cable shopping channel QVC sell Birkenstocks.  To be precise, they have special seasonal shows devoted to the comfort sandal; Nicky Lloyd, Birkenstock UK's sales manager/Chief Liaison with QVC co-presents with one of the other main anchors, waxing lyrical about how great the product is.  Quite frankly, I'm in total agreement: it is a great product, but me being me, I do have to state, as I've said many times before, that they don't stock my size and a 42 in Birkenstock equates to a size 9 apparently.  Also, despite having a relatively slender foot (well a D fitting in Clarks anyway) that the narrow fitting isn't quite right for the Duchess's feet.

Anyway, lo and behold what should turn up on a show but my very own recent purchase, you know, the Zebra print ones, namely these beauties:

I know that you've all seen a picture of them before, but you must admit that they weren't being worn by yours truly, were they? 

The style Tabora is very similar to the Mayari with the exception of being bereft of an extra buckle on the toe strap.  Thus they are slightly less adjustable.  Perfect for me though. 

They sold out on QVC apparently.  I didn't buy any.  I bought mine from a well known internet retailer, yeah Amazon, a place which stocks a size 42, thus Amazon's gain is QVC's loss.  Plus I didn't have to fork out for £4.95 P&P.  Sorted.  I crave further pairs now, it's addictive. 

Sunday: Re-sealing my Birkenstock Collection

Yes, it's Sunday and thoughts turn to re-sealing one's Birkenstock collection.  Do they?  Well, yes it's a chore, but it has to be done, so artist's paintbrush and a tub of globby cork sealant in hand I have completed the task, made sweeter by listening to part one of a documentary about the late, great Humphrey Lyttleton's early years.  This was broadcast on BBC Radio 4 Extra, a station which hosts old and new Radio 4 programmes - I'm rather a fan of their output which I listen to whilst pootling around the house carrying out  chores.

Anyway, here's a picture of my current collection:

Actually, saying that, I do own two new pairs which are somewhere in the house - they are black Gizehs and white Mayaris respectively.  However, I'm not planning to wear them this year - I'll save them for 2015.  Maybe.  The eagle eyed amongst you will undoubtedly see that some pairs are much more worn than others - par example, the patent red Madrid single straps on the top left are very worn indeed, but can (horror of horrors) be worn with socks, as I have today because it's unseasonably cold here in Blighty.  I know that the footbeds can be cleaned using a paste made out of baking powder and water and the whole unit can be re-built by Birkenstock, but seriously what's the point when you can buy a brand new pair for a few pounds more?  Yawn.

Finally, I attach a closer picture of my new Papillio (licensed by Birkenstock) zebra print Taboras.  Now, I've never owned a pair of Papillios (meaning Butterfly in French) before, but as it was 25% off of certain styles on a popular shopping website I decided to splurge. 

Nice aren't they?  Once this darn weather warms up and the rain ceases I'll upload a picture of me wearing them for your enjoyment.  Assuming you like such things - you may not?  I could be speaking to nobody whatsoever here, merely hoping that somebody is reading the text under the numerous photographs?  I do hope not, for everybody's sake. 

Bank Holiday Monday: Red Toenails and Bright Pink Betula Flipflops

Yes, the title says it all - it's currently the first of the UK May Bank Holidays.  I do appreciate them really, but I wish that they'd re-schedule one to fit that dirgey period between the end of August until Christmas when there's too much time between the end of summer until the festive season.  Anyway, the sun's pretty much out so it was pedicure time once again and my tootsies are resplendent in a shade of salsa red as pictured below:

There they are - (almost) fresh from their one hour soak in a bowl full of hot water and Radox salts earlier whilst watching the fiendishly difficult BBC4 quiz Only Connect.  Mmmm.

There they are again, in raised up in the air.  Why this makes a difference I really don't know?  Am I trying to exercise my lower abdominal muscles at the same time?  I do hope that you're enjoying the pictures of my carpet though - actually, saying that, this room is due for refurbishment in the very near future, pretty much when The Duke has completed his DIY evening course (hopefully...)

Pictured above are my new Betula flipflops purchased from an eBay store over in Germany as they don't offer my size in the UK (grrr!)  They are currently flogging them on the shopping channel QVC where they wax lyrical about their 'moulded PU sole until with integral heel cups, longitudinal arch support and toe bar'  Being me, I appreciate such things and also enjoy the non-slip nature of both the undertoe section and the moulded heel cup, of course I do, how could I not? 

Of course, it wouldn't be complete without a picture of the sole unit and here they are.  Betula and Birkenstock fanatics will undoubtedly recognise the 'bone shaped' tread which maximises the non-slip nature of this footwear.  Actually, joking aside after having both a Mother-in-law and a husband who have suffered falls in the last few years I can only commend sensible footwear. 

Saturday: The sun's got its hat on...so it must be time for seasonal footwear to emerge from their respective boxes

Last month I penned a post which stated that I wished to cease updating my blog for a while because "I think it's because I want to focus my writing on the bigger picture as there's so much more to life than feet, shoes and leg/foot coverings."  However, numbering myself along with a huge variety of people who are famous for making comebacks, examples of which are, in no particular order: Barbra Streisand, Mickey Rourke and of course, not forgetting, Noel Edmonds, I have duly returned as I have discovered, in the interregnum, that there really is nothing more to life. 

OK, that's the administration out of the way.  Shoes, feet, all that stuff, yes.  Well, I have purchased a couple of new pairs of summer sandals in the past fortnight and I'm wearing the first ones to arrive at the moment.  Guess which brand of shoe they are?  Can't?  Really?  Well, they're Birkenstocks of course!  Trawling the virtual aisles of a well-known e-retailer I found these beauties pictured below:

I was watching the QVC Birkenstock show which was broadcast a few weeks back (yes readers I recorded it and still keep it stored on my V+ box) they were selling the single-strap Madrid version of these and described the colour as a 'dress blue contrast sandal'.  Of course, as regular readers will undoubtedly know, the largest size QVC sell is an eight, which I can only imagine equates to a EU 41, so no good for me as I take a 42 regular fit (most of their pairs are the narrow footbeds characterised by the shaded footprint on the suede insole.  God, I'm even boring myself here.

Here they are without my feet in them.

...and here's a picture of the contrast soles.  Please note that they're not Louboutins as I doubt that that particular premium brand of footwear would offer a comfort sandal option. 

Finally, here are my husband, the Duke's pair of brown suede Birkenstock clogs.  I'm putting pressure on him to wear them in around the house at the moment as he'll feel the health benefits before long. 

Saturday: Birkenstocks Are Back In Fashion - I've Come Full Circle

Last night I made the decision to take a break from penning this blog for a while; I think it's because I want to focus my writing on the bigger picture as there's so much more to life than feet, shoes and leg/foot coverings.  Anyway, this is a bit of a swansong but The Duke purchased a copy of The Times Weekend Magazine this morning and rather interestingly, there was an article about how 'Flat and Functional' is back in fashion and my favourite Birkenstocks are heading this new fad.

I have tried to replicate the article at the bottom of this post, but please be advised that I haven't got permission to reproduce this content at all as The Times' content is hidden behind a paywall these days.

So, it's all come full circle: my feelings about having big feet, excitement about finally finding a comfortable sandal through to the somewhat clumpy articles becoming 'en vogue' once again.  This therefore marks my last post for the foreseeable future.  Thank you for reading and goodbye.  For now anyway.  

Thursday: Spring Weather, Red Toes and Converse

Today feels very odd indeed because Thursday is usually one of my working days and as a result my week is fairly disjointed.  I have been out and about much more than usual - I was in Guildford on Monday, attended a friend's girlfriend's wake on Tuesday and joined a choir last night.  It's nice weather though and as a result of this, I have painted my toes a dark red, as pictured below:

I hope that you're also enjoying the shot of my brown landing carpet?  Oh you are?  How pleasant.  I think this pot of nail polish is too thick to be of any use because it keeps globbing instead of flowing.  Must see whether I can thin it using nail polish remover as I doubt that paint thinner would suffice?

I also wore my old white leather converse today, as pictured: 

I am writing this whilst listening to Kate Bush's debut album The Kick Inside as I am reading a biography about her at the moment.  I can understand her undoubted talent as a songwriter but her vocals are too high for my personal taste. 

Saturday: 10,000+ page views

Well, it's the first day of March and I guess this means that Spring has sprung; regular readers will no doubt recall that printemps is my favourite season because it brings forward so many possibilities.  To mark the change in season, the WiiFitU's graphics are now showing pink blossom on the Island of Wuhu's trees, which is nice if nothing else?

So, I have had in excess (not the band INXS, although I do recall that the remaining members participated in a reality show to find a replacement for the late Michael Hutchence at some point..) of 10,000 page views since commencing this blog back in October 2012.  Some may wonder how on earth I've managed to sustain foot, shoe and legwear chat over such a long period and the answer is, I really don't know - perhaps I'm completely obsessed?  Does anyone care?

Those of you conversant with Google Blogger will be aware that there's a statistical element to the dashboard - thus I can see sketchy details of who's logging on via country, operating system and indeed by Google search phrase - the latter often makes me smile.  Usually it's such classics as 'sexy black/red toes' or 'Birkenstock feet', perhaps 'sheer tights' or 'bunions' - yes, really.  So, in recognition of this, I'm going to give you all a visual treat - here's two of my most viewed blog posts:

http://nomeanfeetfortheduchess.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/saturday-black-painted-toenails-and.html

http://nomeanfeetfortheduchess.blogspot.co.uk/2013_05_01_archive.html

Friday: That Was The Week That Was [Crap]

Oh flipping hell, life's a right pain in the arse at the moment.  I didn't have a great week at work; plus the Duke's leg swelled up on Tuesday and he had to get it checked out at the GP Surgery.  If that wasn't enough the Earl's thumb developed a large greenish blister on it and the GP advised that he should be taken to the A&E so the Duke had to sit with him until my mother turned up and spent a further two hours waiting to be seen.  Yesterday the Duke held his [early] retirement do at work and I turned up at 5:45 and proceeded to get blind drunk, so much so that I vomited on the train, something I haven't done since I was about 22.  Fantastic (not) - just plain disgusting, but luckily I didn't get any on the upholstery, because that's truly awful.

Today wasn't much better, it was raining when I picked up the Earl from school and we had to detour to post off a parcel; anyway part of the pavement was cordoned off on a busy main road and instead of waiting to cross the road I thought I'd try a shortcut through a car park and re-join the path.  Big mistake: the concrete was still wet and it was like quicksand.  Here's what it did to my poor DMs:

Coated huh?  Do you think that there's a fetish for ladies boots slathered in concrete?  I won't Google it, there's bound to be, isn't there?

I did manage to get it off with a combination of the garden hose and an old dishbrush:

They are now standing in the kitchen drying out with balls of crumpled pages from the London Evening Standard absorbing all of the excess moisture.  At least it's a good use for the tabloid: don't get me wrong, I'm pleased that commuters such as me don't have to fork out 40p to peek between the covers, but it does bore me to death at times.  Sometimes I 'treat' myself on the return journey by not reading it.

Finally: the lady in the post office inquired what was in my parcel.  I said boots, which was fair enough and I know that it's to prevent dangerous items being sent via the Royal Mail, but what if it was a batch of dildos you were returning to say, Lovehoney or Ann Summers?  Embarrassing, especially if it was during the oldie stampede on pension day. 

A Post Without a Picture

Yes, sorry to disappoint, but I'm not including a picture on this post.  The reason is that I've not had polish on my toes for over a week now and they're discoloured and frankly, very ugly, especially the second toe on my left foot which is quite frankly, black.  I did read that both finger and toenails require a period of time without being covered in polish so that they can breathe and repair themselves.  Maybe I'll stick some polish on them during the week?  Or perhaps I won't.

On other foot news, I did read about BBC newsreader Kate Silverton's similar size 9 shoe issues.  Here's a link to a Daily Mail article about the very subject: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2076392/BBC-newsreader-Kate-Silverton-says-size-9-feet-make-life-agony.html

Sunday afternoon/evening: February blues

Blimey, does winter ever end?  Answer: about April?  Well, I've had bronchitis for over a week now and have been off of work as a result.  I know that I'll return to inbox hell, but that's par for the course these days.  I did purchase a new pair of DM boots last Sunday which arrived in the week, but I'll hold off writing about them for the time being.

Here's a trailer/teaser shot of the box.  Enjoy.

Sunday Afternoon in January

I have just realised that I haven't written any blog entries during 2014, so here's my first.  Can I think of a great deal to write about?  No, not really.  Here are a couple of pictures though, the first being my new stripy socks which I purchased from Asda:

They are thick boot socks from the men's section as I can't wear women's socks, the reason being that they are usually sized 4-7, hence they're far too small.

I think you'll no doubt agree that £6 for 4 pairs of socks is outstanding value.  Unfortunately the socks don't appear to be thick enough to stop my two pairs of DMs from rubbing the top of my toes, as pictured below:

That's about it for now...